Easter Blanqui

Cruisin' Down Truckers Boulevard in Ken-tuck-ay

Lil Baji's wedding was this weekend. It's really easy to get to her parents' house. Just take Truckers Blvd straight from Kentucky into Indiana and make a right at the golf course.

Both LB and the big B herself looked gorgeous, but I cannot post their pictures here because, although the photos have been leaked by the president's staff, the president has not yet declassified them.

Instead I present to you the next best thing:

Onion rings!

Wigs!

Tomorrow's Styles Today!

These are the styles! You can have them today! (You could also have them in the '80s, but shhh...)

I can think of another place for those quotation marks. Also, an undiscovered aspect of the Alberto Gonzales vs. a baked potato qualification contest: Gonzales does the day shift, while the baked potato handles the night shift.

I want to get a bunch of these and start an all-girl group/gang. During the day we'll sing inspirational hymns at retirement homes and in the evenings we'll wait outside diners when the old people go for their 5pm baked potato and rob them blind.

No Matter Alive or Die

My beloved Chinese grocery store takes a hardline stance on newspaper pilfering.

Blanquinou Wins Koufax Award

Click for full story.

Cats: They're Just Like Us!

Shame, Thy Name Is Baji

Baji's "present" to me upon my visit to DC, shown in the condition in which I received it (minus 2 which TP ate right in front of me).

Explore France: the Flora & Fauna

The gnarly trees of Montélimar. The bathrooms were also gnarly.

Grandmother and granddog.

Like the Japanese homeless cat, the French SDF (sans domicile fixe) cat also grooms himself. This one's actually not exactly an SDF. He's not allowed in my grandparents' house, which isn't his house. He's also not allowed in the house that is his house. So he's peripherally very homeful, but not in an overhead kind of way. (And I'm the one who let him in the house. But not his house. My grandparents' house.)

Ouf, ze world ees so cruell.
(This cat actually does live in my grandparents' house.)

Magic!

Euh, ello, mai nem eez Monsieur Moustache. Juste louque aht zem!

Pleeze dou notte louque aht mai friende Mamzelle Ponay's butte. Ewe americaines ahrre soh rood!

Voilà.

"And where exactly do you think you were for the last five days?"

Explore France: the Gastronomy

Etorki, or Brebis, also known as Grebis to those who are small and who also think that Madrid is the capital of Greece.

Salade de lardons. Mmmmm.

Gratin dauphinois. Mmmmm.

My grandparents keep the chicken in the closet. Fortunately, they didn't feed us chicken while we were there. As far as we know, they're still alive.

The goose eggs, on the other hand, they keep in the fridge.

Birth of a french fry.

Death of a french fry.

Warning: Saucisson may be highly comestible.

There's nothing like a slab of pork marmelade. Really, there isn't.

After a four-day war of attrition, the United Charcuterie Republic succumbed to a brigade of hungry Frenchmen supported by an American coalition.

Pandas, Pancakes and Panda Cake!

False advertising: Waffles were substituted for the promised pancakes. Thanks a lot, Lil Baji and Lil-Baji-in-Law-To-Be.

Mama Bear. Or is that Papa Bear?

Panda

Panda

Panda

PANDA

PANDA CAKE

Return of the Couch/Return of the Cardigangster

Well, he ain't Clay Aiken, but he'll have to do.

Blanqui's Blog Presents...

Blanqui's Burger

Mambo Two Step in Seven Steps

Step 1: The choice is clear.

Step 2: Miso soup. Delicious.

Step 3, bringing new meaning to the words "two step" (with apologies to Douglas Adams): Edamame. So far, so good. We can totally handle this.

Step 4: Seaweed salad. The true highlight of the meal.

Step 5: Shumai. Eh, who needs 'em. We restrain ourselves and only eat four of the five. Next!

Step 6a: Bonanza! At right, the highly authentic West Village roll. At left, sushi! Center, slabs of delight. To the victor go the spoils (i.e. salmon), and to Yael goes the tuna.

Step 6b: Uh oh, we forgot the main course is still to come. Panic mode! Solution: Leave everything white. (We are duly--and in a decidely un-Nipponese manner--berated for not eating the white tuna.)

Step 7: Seafood teriyaki (shrimp, salmon, and crab, oh my!). The alleged point of this meal is now beside the point. But we still find room. Because we're professionals.

See Steps 2-7 for reasons why we skipped Step 8: Tempura ice cream. (Lies! We skipped it because we had it last time and it wasn't that good.)

Sushi Mambo
255 Bleecker St.
212-675-5885

Hobo Dog

Café con Hobo

Meme: Tagged by the Baj

Four Jobs I've Had in My Life

1) Undersecretary of State for Looking Gorgeous
2) Second Soprano, Manhattan Gay Men's Chorus
3) Webmaster, shoepoopers.org
4) Spiritual Leader, Clay Aiken Fan Club

Four Movies I Could Watch Over and Over

1) Remake of West Side Story, starring Clay Aiken as Anita
2) Remake of The Wizard of Oz, starring Clay Aiken in dual roles as Dorothy and Friend of Dorothy
3) Remake of The Godfather, starring Clay Aiken as Sonny (for which he will win the Oscar for convincingly playing against type)
4) Remake of Gremlins, starring Clay Aiken as the mogwai before they're fed after midnight

Four Places I Have Lived

1) Princeton, NJ
2) Jerusalem, Israel
3) Berkeley, CA
4) New York, NY

Four Places I Have Been On Vacation

My whole life is a vacation, thank you very much.

Four Favorite Foods

1) Meow Mix Upstream Dream with salmon and crab in sauce
2) Fancy Feast Ocean Whitefish Feast in aspic
3) Ice cream and all other dairy products
4) Whiskas Savory Pate with chicken and tuna

Four Places I Would Rather Be Right Now

1) On my couch. Where is it?
2) On Clay Aiken's lap.
3) In a glass (but just up to my neck).
4) In a tub of ice cream (again, up to my neck).

Hobo Cat